England, India Go Missing from Big Sports Tourneys. Does it matter?

England has failed to qualify for Euro 2008. The British economy, by one estimate, could lose out on a £2 billion payoff...

Paul Doyle of The Guardian said:

"...The brutal truth of tonight's 3-2 defeat is this: England aren't one of the best 16 teams in Europe, let alone a world football power.

Blame it on the manager if you want, or a decadent society that means the country's current crop of players are more a bling generation than a golden one. Or perhaps it would be better to blame it on a blind fear and loathing of foreigners, the malaise that moved English fans to boo the Croatian national anthem before the game..."

Sunil Gavaskar wrote (Sportstar November 10, 2007):

“…. England’s failure to qualify for Euro 2008 would be akin to India not making it to the main draw of Asia cup.”

This comparison is not fair. The field for qualification for Euro 2008 was much stronger than Asia cup cricket.

But the point is taken. Gavaskar has always enjoyed rubbing it in when it comes to England. Me too!

The fair comparison would be England’s this failure with India's failure to qualify for the final stage of Cricket World Cup

Gavaskar also said:”…the English players are far more concerned about their club than their country…”

This may also happen to Indian cricketers once professional cricket leagues (Zee and BCCI) in India take off.

Does this loss matter to either team? I think not.

Football in England and Cricket in India are locomotives of massive commercial interests. Those interests keep everybody (media, fans, advertisers, sponsors, commentators, coaches) still follow the losers as closely as winners. In fact, winning or losing is only incidental.

I feel cricket matches in India in future may be organized like free-style wrestling bouts involving brothers, Dara Singh and Randhawa, at Vallabbhai Patel Stadium, Worli in the past: Opponents get beaten by Indian team to give Indian fans a huge high.

Team Croatia played excellent football on Wednesday. But I don't know a single Croatian footballer!

However, I know many English footballers thanks to their scantily dressed wives and girlfriends (WAGs), who keep making appearances on the pages of Indian newspapers almost every single day! Thank goodness, my familiarity with Indian cricketers is more direct!

For example, Carly Zucker of Joe Cole fame appears very often:




Artist: R K Laxman Times of India March 20, 2007

Being Old, Lonely and Sleepy in India

Times of India October 26, 2007:

“Emotions trap lonely seniors:

Acute loneliness among the wealthy elderly in cities is driving some of them towards "emotional entrapment" wherein they are being duped or are willingly bequeathing valuable real estate to their domestic help, driver or other such seemingly helpful people…

…because children and other relatives don't have the time to take care of elderly people living alone. Some acquaintance willing to do all possible errands and is considered trust-worthy, becomes indispensable and wins the hearts and minds of everyone in the family…

…loneliness was a very serious concern among parents of young Indians settled abroad… "

Before my mother died, she used to be taken around in Nashik city in an auto-rickshaw by a loving guy Bhausaheb. He was like a son to her. She loved me; my brother and she loved Bhausaheb. When she was hospitalised, Bhausaheb was in tears, when she died, he was inconsolable.

No reward to Bhausaheb was unfair.

See the picture below.

Hapless old couple, 10:30 PM, failing vision, stiff joints, half-asleep, waiting perhaps for an ISD call, watching domineering, decadent TV.

If anyone cares for them, what do you think is that caring person’s just reward?


Artist: Vasant Sarwate Lalit Diwali वसंत सरवटे ललित दिवाळी 2007

Bored With Monotonous Sledging, Simon Taufel? Visit Andhra Pradesh Assembly

The Telegraph, Calcutta reported on October 30, 2007:

“Taufel bored with sledging: Citing an example of monotonous sledging, Taufel said, “I was in Pakistan recently with Andre Nel playing for South Africa against the Pakistanis. Andre unfortunately only had one line that he was dishing out to Shoaib Malik and the boys… so it got a bit monotonous there.

“We just had a chat to Andre and said to (captain) Graeme Smith, ‘Well, look he’s only traipsing out one line, it’s getting a bit boring.”

How I wish he were umpiring in 1981 Perth test between Pakistan and Australia when Javed Miandad attacked Dennis Lillee with his bat raised. (See picture below)

Currently, Simon Taufel is umpiring at Delhi test match between India and Pakistan. At the end of it, he can fly to Hyderabad to visit Andhra Pradesh assembly, and with luck, can hear following lively exchange between the current chief minister and his predecessor:

“Why are you feeling so restless. I will thoroughly expose you today…(so much so that)…you will feel ashamed that you were born to your mother, you will feel that you should not have born at all. This is just a preamble.” (Times of India July 24, 2007)

However, let us remember what Tanya Aldred claimed in The Guardian October 25, 2007: “Cricketers behaving badly beef up the game's appeal”



Pakistan tour of Australia 1981-82 Perth Test. Poor Tony Crafter, Umpire


Artist: Peter Arno The New Yorker 17 June 1933

Honey, Pack Your Needles. You have a Plum Job Waiting in India.

Which Year Is This? 1807?

Indian Express August 18, 2007 reported:

“…the (Indian) Prime Minister Manmohan Singh revealed how the BJP had tried to invoke divine forces not just to unseat him, but to kill him.

“They (BJP) didn’t even believe I would last as the PM and some leaders even did havans that I should die on a certain day,” said Manmohan Singh in an interview to India Today three months ago but published today…”

On November 20, 2007, The Hindu reported:

“The former (Karnataka)Chief Minister B. S. Yeddyurappa on Monday charged the former Prime Minister H.D. Deve Gowda and his sons with resorting to “black magic” to finish him off.

“I am facing a threat to my life. I know the places where they did pujas under black magic. I will write to the Home Department on Tuesday complaining against the black magic of Mr. Gowda and his sons. They will be responsible if anything happens to my life,” he said.

He said he would also write a public document in this regard.”

I have seen this all in corporate world.

Then, 1989-92, I worked for a major multi-national company in Eastern India. Wife of its Managing Director firmly believed that her husband was the target of Bhanamati, black magic and related stuff. Who was doing it?
None other than his own sister! Mantrik used to often visit them and objects like bones (animal or human?) were hung at different places to counter the magic.

I am sure it exists in film industry too.

It exists in sports. Remember, Sarpa-dosha of Sachin Tendulkar?

Now that he is getting out in 90’s, I wonder if he is going back to Kukke Sri Subrahmanya Temple ahead of tough Australia tour this winter. Brett Lee like Glenn MacGrath before is an evil man!

I have given new caption to following cartoon.

Husband tells his wife: "Honey, Pack Your Needles. You have a Plum Job Waiting in India."


Artist: Charles Addams The New Yorker 21 Apr 1956

One of The Greatest Hits of Marathi Stage Turned 125 and Rise of Indian Metrosexuality

George Orwell:”The only true test of artistic merit is survival.”

“Musical Saubhadra”, Lord Krishna blessed love story of Subhadra and Arjun, by Annasaheb Kirloskar (संगीत सौभद्र, अण्णासाहेब किर्लोस्कर), the biggest hit of 19th and 20th century Maharashtra, completed 125 years of its staging on November 18, 2007.

D G Godse द ग गोडसे and M V Dhond म वा धोंड have written memorable essays on the subject of Marathi stage.

Godse in his essay “centenarian Saubhadra” (शातायुषी सौभद्र, included in his book नांगी असलेले फुलपाखरू, 1989), written to celebrate centenary of the play said:

“...The play is essentially a farce but its structure and development are not foreign but native and in the nature of folk play…

The inspiration could also have come from recently published English historical romantic novels…

Saubhadra, tender and entertaining, never becomes serious but never crosses the limits of good taste...

The play featured for the first time bedroom scene on Marathi stage, done boldly, confidently but tastefully, with restraint…”

Main characters of the play are Krishna, Balaram, Arjun, Subhadra, Rukmini, Narada, Satyaki and among them they sing about 100 songs!

Dhond says:"...Shankararaav Mujumadaar शंकरराव मुजुमदार who played Rukmini couldn't sing. Therefore, Rukmini who moves among the people who sing at the drop of a hat was given no song by Kirloskar!"

Subhadra in later years was played by Marathi stage legends like Balgandharva बालगंधर्व and Keshavrao Bhosale केशवराव भोंसले.

Imitating Balgandharva, college-going young men from all over Maharashtra used to dress like women, get photographed and carry the picture around proudly.
Is this the birth of modern Indian metrosexual man?

If Saubhadra is the greatest comedy of Marathi stage, “One More Glass” by R G Gadkari (1885-1919)[एकच प्याला, राम गणेश गडकरी] is perhaps its greatest tragedy. It soon will complete its own century.

Dhond is his book “Moon of the Fourth Day” (चंद्र चवथिचा, 1987) claims that prodigally talented Gadkari almost invented The Theatre of the Absurd which was later done by Samuel Beckett and Eugène Ionesco.

Are women in the picture below watching Saubhadra?


Artist: Peter Arno April 10, 1926

Guests Who Came In from the Cold. And Got Noticed!

Writing for Outlook Magazine October 15, 2007, Khushwant Singh said:

“…There is not enough about nature in Outlook. The only magazine which has made it a regular feature is Frontline. But it tends to be scholastic, with limited readership appeal.

Outlook could not only explain phenomena like the disappearance of vultures, sparrows, frogs, fireflies and moths during the rainy season but also have more stories about human-animal bonding.

Besides dogs like Vinod's Editor, cats, parrots and partridges, there are plenty of stories of humans with pet donkeys, goats, hens, squirrels, lizards, cows, buffaloes, camels etc, which are very heartwarming.”

After reading this and reading it aloud, I did my own stock taking.

My wife and son next day showed me a frog. We still spot sparrows and moths but they have considerably reduced in number and their arrival inside the house is a novelty now. And I haven’t seen a vulture and fireflies for years now.

Indian newspapers too have so little on nature. I am talking about the nature around me in urban sprawls, and not in some distant Chandrapur or Himalayas. (Sorry Maruti Chitampalli मारुती चित्तमपल्ली, you have written so well on Indian wild life. But I am not talking abour your kind of writing.)

For example, as I was writing this, I saw a small stray cat chasing a full size mongoose. I couldn't follow the duo. I wonder what happened. During my school days, I used to follow big ants मुंगळे for hours.

Every tree, weed, flower, insect, amphibian, bird and mammal has a story to tell and some one needs to hear and tell it. Similar to what Durga Bhagwat दुर्गा भागवत did it in her Rutu Chakra ऋतुचक्र (1956).

I am particularly impressed with Verlyn Klinkenborg of The New York Times who writes about such things regularly. Or read two excellent articles on the subject of ants in NYT November 13, 2007.

Thankfully, Marathi newspapers couldn’t ignore colourful guests who have barged in this month.

Lokmat November 18, 2007 has the following story on migratory birds.



I wonder to which airport lounge following board belongs!


Artist: James Stevenson The New Yorker 22 Apr 1974

Brave New World 75 Years Nearer! Let's Stay in Gated Communities.

Aldous Huxley’s “Brave New World” completes 75 years this year.

For India of 1932, when Mahatma Gandhi still walked upon the earth, Brave New World would have looked very, very far. But for today’s Indian middle class, it’s here and now!

I give a small example. I then was working for a small IT company started by Indian-Americans. One day I heard the ultimate desire of three of my highly educated (IIT, CA, REC) and very well paid colleagues: To stay in gated-communities in Mumbai, to avoid all the dirt and poverty of the place.

Margaret Atwood writes for The Guardian.

“…Brave New World hasn't gone away. Shopping malls stretch as far as the bulldozer can see. On the wilder fringes of the genetic engineering community, there are true believers prattling of the gene-rich and the gene-poor - Huxley's alphas and epsilons - and busily engaging in schemes for genetic enhancement and - to go one better than Brave New World - for immortality.

…The first world war marked the end of the romantic-idealistic utopian dream in literature, just as several real-life utopian plans were about to be launched with disastrous effects. The Communist regime in Russia and the Nazi takeover of Germany both began as utopian visions.

… At the time he was writing Brave New World he was still in shock from a visit to the United States, where he was particularly frightened by mass consumerism, its group mentality and its vulgarities.

… Despite the dollops of sex-on-demand, the bodies in Brave New World are oddly disembodied, which serves to underscore one of Huxley's points: in a world in which everything is available, nothing has any meaning.

… Meanwhile, those of us still pottering along on the earthly plane - and thus still able to read books - are left with Brave New World. How does it stand up, 75 years later? And how close have we come, in real life, to the society of vapid consumers, idle pleasure-seekers, inner-space trippers and programmed conformists that it presents?

The answer to the first question, for me, is that it stands up very well. It's still as vibrant, fresh, and somehow shocking as it was when I first read it.

The answer to the second question rests with you. Look in the mirror: do you see Lenina Crowne looking back at you, or do you see John the Savage? Chances are, you'll see something of both, because we've always wanted things both ways. We wish to be as the careless gods, lying around on Olympus, eternally beautiful, having sex and being entertained by the anguish of others. And at the same time we want to be those anguished others, because we believe, with John, that life has meaning beyond the play of the senses, and that immediate gratification will never be enough…”



'It kind of brings a tear to your eye -- a whole new generation of little consumers.'

On Greatest Plague of Today, Lok Sabha Speaker Says...

Nicholas Taleb
"....journalism may be the greatest plague we face today- as the world becomes more and more complicated and our minds are trained for more and more simplification". (Fooled by Randomness, 2004)

P. Devarajan
“Journalists will have to face up to a bruising fact: The poor are not their concern any more. Reporting the rich and their ways matters. The public does not believe them any more. They do not take them seriously.”

David Foster Wallace
"TV is not vulgar and prurient and dumb because the people who compose the audience are vulgar and dumb. Television is the way it is simply because people tend to be extremely similar in their vulgar and prurient and dumb interests and wildly different in their refined and aesthetic and noble interests."

Vinod Mehta
"Since most of the media is run by brand managers, and since nearly all restaurants (excluding dhabas) are potential advertisers, it is considered prudent not to annoy them."

Asian Age on November 17 2007 reported:

" Lok Sabha Speaker Somnath Chatterjee on Friday said he found it difficult to distinguish between "page one of many newspapers and the famous page three" which, at times, was only a reference page for all the numerous pages in the day’s newspaper.

Speaking on "Media as People’s Voice — Pre and Post-Independence" at the national press day celebrations organised by the Press Council of India, Mr Chatterjee said the basic feature of post-Independence media is the change in the nature of ownership.

"Owning a channel or a newspaper is now seen as a profit-making venture, as indeed it is in all countries where advertising sustains the profitability of a channel or paper," he said.

Commenting on the change in priorities of the media, the Lok Sabha Speaker said:

"We have the spectacle of newspapers and new channels spending considerable space and their time either telling us about the latest developments in the social lives of those who are in the entertainment industry or some favourite sportspersons or giving unsolicited astrological advice or covering extramarital affairs of even ordinary people sometimes and bizarre stories from remote corners, like snake gods drinking milk in a particular home."

Note- Following picture was drawn pre-independence of India and published post-independence.


Artist: Barney Tobey The New Yorker 16 August 1947

Take a Voveran, They are Only Forty Bucks!

Times of India November 15, 2007 reported:

“Prices of commonly-used medicines have gone up by nearly 10% every year for the last 10 years. This is much more than the country's inflation rate and higher than annual increase in income of the common man. ….”

What is India’s current inflation rate?

According to Business Line November 12, 2007: For September 2007, Wholesale Price Index-based inflation was 3.39% while consumer price index for urban non-manual employees was 5.74%

Times of India also reported on October 26, 2007:
“Painkillers overtake cough syrups: When diabetes and hypertension are increasingly becoming part of our lifestyle, it seems aches and pains are bothering us the most. Painkiller drug Voveran has emerged as the top brand in the domestic pharmaceutical market with the largest sales, for the first seven months of 2007.

Sales of Voveran by Novartis, outstripped the traditional top rankers - cough and cold formulations, Phensydyl and Corex - with sales touching nearly Rs 75 crore for January-July this year, according to ORG….”


Asian Age September 3, 2007

(click on the picture to get an enlarged view)

Tired of Sterile ODI Cricket? Try Red-Clay Wrestling & Kabaddi

Chandrahar Patil चंद्रहार पाटील of Sangli became Maharashtra Kesari महाराष्ट्र केसरी last night November 15, 2007. He promptly thanked my childhood heroes Ganpat Andalkar गणपत आंदळकर and Maruti Mane मारुती माने among others. (By the way, on the same day, in another boring, predictable ODI cricket match, India beat Pakistan.)

TV program showcased halgi (हलगी, a small drum) player Raju Awale who played at the tournament including the final. It brought back memories of ever-smiling, friendly, wiry wrestler Suresh Awale सुरेश आवळे of Miraj who died very young in a train accident.

For the first time in my life, I watched wrestling for the title of Maharashtra Kesari live on television. What fun! Although it lasted for just over 3 minutes and took place on mat, wearing non-traditional clothing.

For few years, occasionally, I have participated in red clay wrestling. Smell of the clay still fills my nostrils. I used to get beaten quite easily. If your face is in clay longer than your opponent, you get more time to smell it! This all happened at the red clay wrestling ring of Bhanu Talim भानू तालीम,Miraj.

Wrestlers were as popular as cricketers. Every time Hindkesari Maruti Mane was spotted on his motorcycle at Miraj, we stopped in our tracks and looked in awe. When we went visiting our aunt Tai-mavashi ताई-मावशी at Kolhapur, we saw gentle giants of Motibag Talim मोतीबाग तालीम. They walked past aunt's house the way elephants go to watering hole, with grace and humility, without a sound.

When at 1972 Munich Olympics Premnath (4th place Bantamweight) and Sudesh Kumar (4th place Flyweight) did well; they were as big heroes for me as Sunil Gavaskar and G R Viswanath who had helped us beat West Indies and England previous year.

On the other hand, North Indian wrestler Satpal was as unpopular as Ahmad Shah Abdali because he used to beat Marathi speaking wrestlers.

Kabaddi is another sport that has given me endless pleasure. I was better at it than wrestling! Even if we got 15 minutes of free time at school, we played Kabaddi.

Asian Age November 15, 2007 reports:”British in India to play kabaddi”.

I ask: When are Indians in India going to wrestle and play kabaddi?

Artist: Otto Soglow The New Yorker 25 February 1928